As you all know, school is back. And with that comes The Crud. You all know The Crud. The runny nose, sneezing, post-nasal drip that makes your throat hurt and you spend 20 minutes hacking/choking as you furiously rummage through your purse for a cough drop... while you're in a room full of people... who are all trying to listen to a speaker.
Oh, is that just me? Yesterday?
Anyway, The Crud first started with the 12-year-old within the first week of school. Typically, it takes about a month or so for The Crud to enter our house, so it was a little surprising to see that little bastard so fast.
I blame middle school.
His runny nose/cough lasted only a few days and then we were in the clear... until last weekend when I got it and the 9-year-old got it. And, somehow, my mother.
That's a wicked Crud.
So, since Saturday, we've been weathering the storm. Most of my colds start and end the same way. I spend the first day sneezing my life away (did you know your heart stops every time you sneeze? I could be dead by now!). I've been "bless you"ed enough times this week that I'm a sure thing for heaven. The rest of the days alternate between runny/stuffy nose and sore throat. It ends within a week or so and then we go about our lives.
Can I admit that, when I was young, I actually enjoyed the occasional cold? I'd gather a box of tissues, a glass of orange juice and a blanket and veg in front of the TV. It was kinda nice to pamper myself while I practically sneezed up a lung.
But, nowadays, ain't nobody got time to be sick. I have to manage the lives of little people. And work. And, you know, life. And, for whatever reason, illnesses take longer now that I'm old. The 9-year-old got through it in 2-3 days while I'm still sneezing. I mean, what the? Sneezing is only supposed to be day 1! I'm supposed be done by now! I shouldn't have gone through an entire box of Kleenex 5 days in!
But, I suppose I can look on the bright side. To quote the great "Sixteen Candles":
"They'll feel some massive guilt. It could be highly profitable."
It's not working yet, but I'll hold my breath... it might stop the sneezing.
