I come from a big family. My dad is one of seven. Almost all of my aunts and uncles had 3 or more children. There are 23 of us first cousins. Twenty-three people (not including my aunts and uncles) that you have to meet, learn (and remember) their names, learn (and remember) their spouses’ names (there are 16 of them), and learn (and remember) their children’s names (27 of them – if I’m counting right [even I get them confused]).
Presently, if you were to meet my family as a whole, you’d be meeting about 75 people. And that's just on my dad's side. For a holiday meal, it’s a lot of pressure. In my day, you didn’t bring a significant other to a meal unless you were serious. And either your date can hack it, or he can’t. And we've been through many who can't.
And if he can’t? He’ll be missing out. For all of the chaos (and the Peters) my family possesses, the wonderful memories that result from Thanksgivings and Christmases, Titas Golf Outings, and the like wouldn't be traded for anything.
Anyway, my cousin-in-law noticed we don’t really know the new women entering our family. The men in our family have golf outings and manly events in order to bond, but the women never get together to do anything. And, when we get together for holidays and parties, we’re constantly chasing after the (27) children and never have time to drink our wine and gab.
So, she decided to put together an event for the ladies, which included manicures/pedicures, dinner and a Shakespeare play in the park (she made me describe it as that - I was just going to say "outdoor play," but we sound much classier this way). We invited the aunts, the cousins, and the girlfriends we knew the names of (sorry to any we missed).
We had a good turnout. Manicures and pedicures galore. We lost some cousins after that, but gained some others for dinner, including the girlfriend of one of my younger cousins. She? Is awesome. For one, she doesn’t know any of us from
But, she came anyway. And held her own. We have some pretty strong personalities in my family. Yet, she was able to engage herself in the conversations and, when the check came and my aunt (read: strong personality) suggested we divide the check equally, she said, “Um, I only brought cash” and “I only had a salad."
This, my friends, was great. She was right, and, in the end, it was decided that we'd pay for her. Woo! Sticking up for yourself! A great way to get your meal paid for you! (Take notes, dear reader.)
Once dinner was over, a few of us decided to go out for one more drink (and to screw the play, apparently). And the awesome girlfriend came with us. When she had a perfectly reasonable excuse to run for the hills, she didn’t take it. I’m telling you, if my cousin doesn’t marry her, I will... er, I mean, I will make my brother marry her. Or I'll adopt her. Or something.
The group of us out for drinks consisted of 2 cousins-in-law, my sister-in-law, the awesome girlfriend and... me. The only blood relation. We spent time regaling the awesome girlfriend with stories of the family. My one cousin-in-law shared that she wasn't allowed to come to a family function until she and my cousin, Peter (of course), were engaged (and they had been dating since the 8th grade). Her first family function happened to be Christmas. And we sang. A lot.
My sister-in-law admitted that we are intimidating. I agreed. We have our own Yahoo group and Facebook page. When I was young, I was afraid to come into the party because of the sheer number of people to say hello to - and I am related to all of these people!
My husband's family consists of 8 people. Total. When he came to his first family function, he didn't know where to look first. So, I get it. The awesome girlfriend told us that my cousin doesn't even know how we're all related and didn't really give her much of a warning when she was first brought around the extended family. Nice.
She's still awesome, though, and I'll be happy to call her a
Some favorite lines from the evening:
- My aunt to her daughter-in-law, who ordered a salad AND an entree: “Oh (cousin-in-law), you’re going to be full.” My cousin-in-law is an adult... I'm pretty sure.
- Soon-to-be (come hell or high water) cousin-in-law, upon discovering she might have to shell out $45 for a salad and a taste of sheep cheese: “But I already paid for my wine.”
- Me to another cousin-in-law, while driving past my grandmother’s old house (NOTE: This house holds wonderful memories for us all [as well as 100 bedrooms] and my cousin-in-law would like to buy the house if it ever comes on the market): “Yeah, but it’s not in such a great neighborhood.” Cousin-in-law: “Uh, this is my neighborhood.”
And, T? Thanks for thinking that was the funniest part of the evening. You kind of suck.
A good night had by all, even if it was, partly, at my (and my family's) expense.
